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This is a post because I want to express the inequality and I want to call for justice for all.
This is not meant as a personal opinion or judgment, this post is about showing and talking about corruption and stupid hard-headed people who are threatening millions of people's life. This post shows what effects it has when your loaner cutoffs your daily income and what consequence it has for those who are working in an underrated industry but still behind the scenes it is about humans who are doing a job and wanted to earn money legally.
I am talking about it because it makes me mad to see that millions of people are suffering from these actions and that there is no solution for that as of the moment. I cannot be quiet because people are being treated like dumb asses. If no one talks about it, nothing in this world will change.

This post is about
'War Against Sex Workers:' What Visa and Mastercard Dropping Pornhub Means to Performers

Source




//The world's biggest credit card companies terminated service to Pornhub, and performers on the site say it could seriously harm their livelihoods.

This week, Visa and Mastercard cut ties with Pornhub, decision sex workers say will only harm their industry, and won't actually help victims of non-consensual imagery.  

In what seemed to be a bit of good news on Tuesday, Pornhub announced that it would change its policies to only allow verified users to upload content to, or download from, the platform—as well as enact a more robust moderation process. This was a welcome shift and was a long time coming: non-consensual sexual imagery activists, as well as performers whose work is often pirated and reposted to Pornhub, have been asking for these changes for years. 

The verified users that are now the only ones able to upload or download to Pornhub are also suddenly unable to receive payouts through the two biggest credit card companies.  

Sex workers and activists say that this is a dangerous, discriminatory decision—one fueled by anti-porn campaigners and conservative activist groups who want sex work abolished. 

In a statement published Friday, Sex Workers Outreach Project Behind Bars wrote that the decision will force more sex workers into the margins, calling it a "war" on sex workers.

"We say 'war against sex workers' because the damage they do does not impact the labor as much as it affects the laborers who depend on the Pornhub platform to earn a living," it wrote. "[...] Violence against sex workers includes the societal and institutional violence that has led to the shuttering of the online platforms that give us a measure of safety and allow us the critical resource that is the ability to access banking." 

“If they can be shut down or hurt by this campaign, what hope is there for smaller platforms?”

All of these changes came days after a piece published by Nicholas Kristof in the New York Times, which highlighted the plight of child sexual abuse survivors whose images were posted Pornhub. Despite writing about an issue that's been used as political ammunition to censor adult content on the internet for decades—including the deeply harmful Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act of 2018—he barely cited performers who use the site or sex worker rights activists.

Instead, he opted to name-check Traffickinghub, a campaign run by conservative religious anti-trafficking organization Exodus Cry, which opposes decriminalizing sex work and wants to abolish porn altogether.

In that opinion piece, Kristof directly calls for payment processors to drop Pornhub: "And call me a prude, but I don’t see why search engines, banks, or credit card companies should bolster a company that monetizes sexual assaults on children or unconscious women. If PayPal can suspend cooperation with Pornhub, so can American Express, Mastercard, and Visa," he wrote. "I don’t see any neat solution." 

Much of the content on Pornhub is free to view, but for many performers, Pornhub was a stable revenue stream. The platform's verified Amateur Program, as well as the clip selling service Modelhub and ad revenue made on video uploads, make up a constellation of ways performers can make money on Pornhub. Kristof's inability to see a "neat solution" erases the fact that many people rely on tube sites like Pornhub for their livelihoods, even though these sites are incredibly flawed. It's not prudish to suggest child exploitation should stop and it's willfully ignorant to suggest that it would be; everyone agrees on that, including Pornhub. Suggesting all payments on the site should be dropped is, however, callous and myopic. 

"This is something we in the industry have known about for a long time, but often the trafficking or child porn headlines will drown out our voices," cam model Mary Moody told me. "We saw a similar issue unfold under SESTA/FOSTA when survival or full-service sex workers were unable to verify through Backpage and had to move to the more risky street-based work, where a disproportionate amount of minority groups are arrested."

Porn performers have dealt with de-platforming and discriminatory payment processing practices from the beginning of the internet and beyond, but have always adapted, finding new ways to continue their work. But if two of the biggest credit card companies in the world can choose to deny service to Pornhub—a household name for online porn—some worry that nothing's stopping them from denying service to smaller platforms, too. 

"Pornhub/Mindgeek are a huge company with far more resources than most online platforms—if they can be shut down or hurt by this campaign, what hope is there for smaller platforms?" model Avalon Fey said. "By targeting Pornhub and successfully destroying the ability for independent creators to monetize their content, they have made it easier to remove payment options from smaller platforms too. This has nothing to do with helping abused victims, and everything to do with hurting online adult entertainers to stop them from creating and sharing adult content."   

Many adult content creators make an income through several outlets, using a combination of clip sites, live streaming, subscription platforms, and independent websites, depending on what works for them. In the two years performer, Vinnie O'Neill has been in the adult industry, Pornhub and Modelhub have been his best-performing platform in terms of revenue and followers. Now, he’s worried that will all change.

“Sex workers are scared by this change, despite not having uploaded any illegal content”

"Visa and MasterCard have actually been hurting our ability to make money long before they banned Pornhub from their payment networks," O'Neill said. "For years, content creators have been suffering from having their content deleted because companies like Visa and MasterCard, through policies that constantly change, ban certain words and types of adult content." 

During an unprecedented economic downturn and lack of support from the government, sites like OnlyFans have exploded in growth, as people turn to sex work to pay the bills. Dylan Thomas, an amateur performer, told me that after coming out as trans and facing discrimination and harassment in his former career, as well as a decrease in regular income from the pandemic, he chose to start modeling on Pornhub to make money. "Now Mastercard and Visa are essentially for lack of a better term cock-blocking my potential to generate income through Pornhub and Modelhub," he said. "I am watching to see if my OnlyFans will be their next target and sincerely hoping not." 

Sex workers are often the most vocal, constructive critics of the platforms they use, and many have been trying to get Pornhub to change its unverified upload policies for years. Six months ago, adult model Ginger Banks started a petition specifically to ask Pornhub to change its upload policies to make them safer. No one wants sexual abuse imagery to proliferate on the internet, let alone on a site they use every day for income. But Pornhub's policy shift seems to have come too late. 

"Pornhub has operated like the wild wild west, allowing pirated content which sometimes is non-consensual content," performer Allie Eve Knox said in a Twitter thread about the news. "Some of that content stays up for way too long after takedown requests, super problematic, and potentially harmful. None of us like that this happens and we have spoken out about how to fix these issues for years," she wrote.

As flawed as Pornhub is, many are also asking why sites like Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, which have reported millions of more instances of non-consensual abusive imagery, aren't targeted the way porn sites are. Facebook alone reported 84 million instances of child sexual abuse material over the last three years. 

"Of course, no one will petition for those social media sites to be taken down—because people are more concerned about porn and sex work than anything else,” performer Gwen Adora, who has also been outspoken about conservative lobbyists' efforts against porn, told me earlier this year. 

Payment processors have been censoring sex workers for years, by banning adult platforms from hosting certain types of porn, such as blood play, urine, and sleeping—or by closing individual bank accounts altogether. Pulling support from a massive porn network, however, is different.

"Sex workers are scared by this change, despite not having uploaded any illegal content," Fey said, "because we have seen these patterns before and have had sites and payment processors permanently and unexpectedly shut down." //

In addition to that, I wanted to share a Twitter by Asa Akira and her words are just lovely and true about the current situation.

She added the following thread to this
//"What’s happening to Pornhub is not a war on Pornhub, sexual abuse, or child trafficking; it’s a war on sex work. These supposed “activists” are rightwing, anti-porn, anti-feminist, anti-sex workgroups using unfortunate situations victims have had to endure, to push their own agenda.  

They donate millions, head campaigns to better the world (not just in areas of human sexuality, but also the environment, feminism, etc.), and are proudly supported by much of mainstream media. If they can be taken down by such hate - who is next? How are we, as an industry, safe?

whether it be social media platforms treating us with extreme bias, politicians attempting to (and succeeding) in passing measures that further put us in danger, or evangelist groups trying to shut us down under the guise of “saving the children” like in this particular instance.

Pornhub is the only big media platform that has human moderators screening every video before publishing - a fact that is highlighted in the data that Facebook has had 84 MILLION cases of Child Sexual Abuse Material reported in the last 3 years, and Pornhub has had 118. Total.

They have always worked with the authority to catch these sick predators and continue to search for ways to better prevent such videos from seeing the light of day. Recently, they banned and deleted ALL uploads from non-verified users.

Thank u for reading all of this. I will always continue to live as my true horny self, and I will never give up on my right to do so. But I am scared.

One thing all of these fights have in common, is that they are always led - dishonestly - in the name of “activism.” Please, I beg of you, do not be fooled by this.

Again, if even they are not safe - what does that mean for adult work?? I am most saddened because Pornhub has unapologetically stood as allies and defenders of us sex workers when so many companies we work with have not.

In the time I’ve been in porn, there has not been a single moment we sex workers have been free of this war;

What’s scarier this time around for me - compared to any of the times before - is that Pornhub is arguably the biggest, most mainstream company our industry has ever seen. They are a household name and have done more than any other company in the past to normalize sex work.

I hope Visa and MasterCard see the harm they are doing to sex workers and the porn industry, but I’m not hopeful; they’ve never been our allies, and I doubt they will start now. It’s a very sad, disheartening time... but I can’t really say any of it is brand new."//

Again, this is what she said on her Twitter account and I believe she spoke for millions of workers in the industry. You can find her Twitter Account right here Asa Akira.

I had to reshare this and had to make a post about it because I am a supporter that everyone is being treated equally, fairly, and that we all experience the same rights and justice as we deserve because we are all humans.

If you want to support the industry and this post as well, please share it, and make it aware.

Thank you,
Lovely.
Hi Lovelies,

It is Lovely 

Herself

(should I think about a new intro) 😑

Anyways, you are on my website so you are lovely.

Welcome December 🎄

What can you expect from me during this December month?

On December 12, we will be hosting our next LIVE stream on

www.mixcloud.com/live/llqlovely

with guest mixes by star DJs

Nakadia

Marika Rossa

Deborah De Luca

John Odin and myself.

And then from December 19-21, there will be a celebrate feature on my website for the very first time and if you are following me on my social media you know that I like break standards and that I want to talk about topics that are not on everyone's daily plate and in December I want to talk about the XXX business and I will be featuring Ms. Abigail Mac as my guest and star of the month.
There will be a lot of stuff that we will be featuring during these days so have an eye on that.
And on December 30 there will be a special review of 2020 and a message from me for you Lovez, but for now I am not going to reveal the secret yet.

So be excited for that one and hope to see you on December 12, 8pm HKT, 1pm CT, 9am PST.



XOXO, Lovely





Hi, Lovelies,

It is Lovely

Herself.




November 8 is the date chosen to highlight the continued need to advocate for the right to be biologically different. The goal is gender equality and independent bodily self-determination for people whose biological sex does not conform to the myth or stereotype that people are born only either male or female.







November 8th was chosen to honor the birthday of Herculine Barbin, a 19th-Century intersex person who was forced into the public eye after doctors found her to be intersex and whose short and often unhappy life highlights the need for increased acceptance of intersex people. The goals of this day include education, showing the need to stop Intersex Genital Mutilation, upholding intersex rights to dignity and equality, equal access to prenatal medical care, and solidarity of intersex people and friends, families, and supporters.




Intersex Education and Intersex Population Statistics




Intersex is the medical reference term for people who are biologically in between the currently accepted medical definitions of the male to the female gender classification system. This can be through variations of expected hormones, chromosomes, internal or external genitalia, or any combination of any or all primary and/or secondary sex characteristics. While some individuals are identified or diagnosed as intersex at birth, many are not. As intersex is only about biological sex, it is distinct from gender identity and sexual orientation.




Some intersex people are also chimeras. The word Chimera refers to when twins, triplets, or other numbers of multiples merge in the womb, resulting in the birth of a composite person whose body is made of multiples merged into one. The person is a chimera; the phenomenon is chimerism. With the increase in IVF and other fertility treatments, we are noticing more DNA variations and chimerism and even have observed individuals in the uterus that are Siamese twins that rejoin into a single body before birth. There are many ways for a person to be born with unusual DNA and atypical appearances.




If you consider all known intersex variations, such as hormones, chromosomes, and genitalia variations, intersex birth rates were seen 20 years ago as being 1 in every 100 live births, but now intersex people have been coming forward as frequently as 1 in 10 people, 1 in 5 from another source. One in every 8 pregnancies start out as multiples, and many of these result in chimeras being born. This shows these communities to be larger than previously known. Adults were previously unaware of their own medical status unless the variations on the gender spectrum were visible. It is evident that many infants in the next generations will be identified as intersex in the womb, and that our society members of all ages from seniors to developing fetuses and children need equal rights to medical care.




Bodily Self-Determination & Stopping Intersex Genital Mutilation




A person has the inherent right to make informed decisions about what happens to their own body, including changes to their sexual and reproductive systems. People have the right to make consensual medical decisions based on fully informed consent as to what happens to their bodies. Currently, many doctors encourage unnecessary non-consensual cosmetic surgery on/for intersex people, specifically young children, infants, and babies. The stated goal is often only to make the child’s body conform to the chosen assigned gender. These surgical procedures are also a form of forced sterilization, as the child’s testes and/or ovaries are often removed in the process. The United Nations has declared surgery of this form an outright form of torture, three retired United States Surgeons-General have declared it inappropriate when done without informed consent, and prior to Green Party Presidential Candidate Dr. Jill Stein made stopping Intersex Genital Mutilation (IGM) part of her campaign. It should be considered a natural inherent right for all infants to be allowed to keep their reproductive organs without mandatory gender conformity surgery.




Equality for Medical, Legal, and Political Rights




Non-binary (NB) is recognized as an acceptable alternative to male/female gender identification. The Green Party supports the inherent reproductive right that pregnant individuals be allowed to give birth to children identified as intersex during an ultrasound or other medical diagnostic methods without the children being subject to gender discrimination at birth. This includes helping support efforts to make the medical system more respectful of intersex peoples' bodies, opposing restrictive/hateful legislative bills in your communities, and supporting efforts to gain increased human rights protection, recognition, and equality under the law for all people, regardless of gender identity.

Let's all remember that day and celebrate together in peace and harmony.

OOO, Lovely.


Hi Lovelies,

This is Lovely

HERSELF

And in today's post, I would like to give you all the needed information on the upcoming LIVESTREAM on October 10, 2020, at 8 pm HKT, 10pm UCT.





The stream will be available on my Mixcloud channel LLQLOVELY

Here is the timetable

8pm-9pm Davidi 

9pm-10pm Nolah 

10pm-11pm Sara Krin 

11pm-12am Sole Llorente 

12am-1am Pat Santos 

1am-3am Marie Vaunt 

3am-4am Lovely Heaven

4am-5am Kate 

5am-6am Varya 




I will be posting bios and information about each DJ on my Facebook so please make sure to follow me there, as well as on my Instagram.

OOO, Lovely
Hi Lovelys,

It is Lovely

HERSELF

and in today's post, I want to talk about vegan leather, what it is and how to take care of it




Vegan leather and faux leather are the same thing—essentially a fake 'leather' material that does not use animal skin.

There is a range of materials that can be used to make vegan leather, including synthetics like plastic and natural materials such as cork.

The most commonly used materials for synthetic leathers are polyvinyl chloride (PVC) and polyurethane (PU), which are plastic-based materials. Another term for fake leather is "pleather,” which comes from the term plastic leather.

These two commonly used synthetic materials in particular have raised questions about the safety and dangers of vegan leather to the environment. Very few vegan leathers are made from natural materials, although it is possible to find more eco-friendly products made from materials like cork, kelp, and even pineapple leaves.

HOW IS VEGAN LEATHER MADE?

Synthetic leather is produced with different chemicals and a totally different industrial process than real leather. Bonding together a plastic coating to a fabric backing is the most common way to make faux leather; the types of plastic used in these coatings vary, and this is what defines whether it is eco-friendly.

Although PVC is in much less use than it was in the 1960s and ’70s, it can still be found in the composition of some vegan leather. PVC releases dioxins, which are potentially dangerous in confined spaces and especially dangerous if burned. It also uses plasticizers such as phthalates to make it flexible. Depending on the type of phthalate used, it's extremely toxic. It has been described by Greenpeace as the “single most environmentally damaging type of plastic”.

The more modern and slightly less damaging plastic is PU, which is constantly being technically developed to reduce its flaws, such as the hazardous toxins it releases during manufacturing and the oil-based polymers it’s made with, which make use of fossil fuels.


WHAT DOES VEGAN LEATHER SMELL LIKE?
Vegan or faux leather that is made with PVC or PU often has a very strange smell from the chemicals. It’s often described as a 'fishy' smell and can often be very hard to get rid of, especially while trying not to ruin the material. PVC can also emit dangerous toxins that give off this nasty smell.

WHAT DOES VEGAN LEATHER LOOK LIKE?
Vegan leather comes in several forms and qualities, so some are more 'leather-like' than others. Generally speaking, and focusing on good-quality vegan leather, there isn’t that much difference to real leather. However, as vegan leather is synthetic, it doesn’t form a patina like real leather does when aging, and it is much less breathable as the pores that are printed onto the surface of pleather are artificial.

VEGAN VERSUS REAL LEATHER:
The main concern for most people when deciding between vegan and real leather is the impact it has on animals and the environment. However, while the term vegan leather might imply an environmentally friendly product, this is not always the case.

IS VEGAN LEATHER BENEFICIAL TO THE ENVIRONMENT?
Faux leather is known as vegan leather because the material used is never from animal skins. Although this is a huge benefit for animal activists, the manufacture of synthetic leather is not beneficial to the environment or humans due to the toxins in the plastics used to make it. The manufacture and disposal of PVC-based synthetics let out hazardous dioxins, which can cause developmental and reproductive issues and even cause cancer. The synthetics used in vegan leathers also don’t fully biodegrade; although they can be broken down to a degree, they can also release toxic particles and phthalates, which can affect the health of animals and the environment.



VEGAN LEATHER IS BETTER THAN REAL LEATHER.
Quality and durability are also important things to consider when comparing vegan and real leather. Vegan leather is often a lot thinner than real leather and much more lightweight, which is great for fashion as it makes it potentially easier to work with; however, it also makes it less durable than real leather. Real, good-quality leather can last decades when cared for, whereas you might only get a year or so out of a pair of shoes made from good-quality faux leather. This is an important factor when deciding between fake leather and real leather, as the environmental impact of replacing a fake leather product multiple times is arguably more damaging than the purchase of one real leather item.


Synthetic leathers also wear out very unattractively, whereas real leather ages over time and forms a patina, which is considered to add character to the leather.


Faux leather, especially PVC-based, isn’t breathable either, whereas real leather has pores through which the skin is able to breathe. So for clothing items such as jackets, vegan leather can be uncomfortable when worn for long periods of time.


In addition to environmental factors, faux leather is typically a lot cheaper than real leather products. This is because it’s cheaper to produce synthetic plastic leather than it is to produce real leather. The craftsmanship of leather products is a highly skilled job, and bespoke leather products such as sofas, jackets, and luggage can cost thousands of dollars. Manufacturers are able to command these prices because they are considered both high-quality and highly durable.

MAINTAINING VEGAN LEATHER
As vegan leather is made with a plastic coating, it is already waterproof. This makes it easier to clean by using a mild detergent or just by wiping it with a damp cloth; however, it also means that conditioning products can’t penetrate it to stop it from drying up and cracking, which can happen if the fake leather is in the sun a lot and also if it’s particularly poor quality material. However, you can get certain products that will cover the surface of the plastic to prevent high temperatures and sun rays from cracking the surface. Such products can also help soften the material.

HOW TO REPAIR VEGAN LEATHER
You can replace or patch up the damaged area with a faux leather repair kit that can be bought online; they’re easy to use and suited to different types of faux leather.


Is Vegan Leather Good Quality?
Vegan leather can come with different standards of quality, and as with real leather, the higher the quality, the longer it will last. Faux leather is generally a lot cheaper and of lower quality than real leather, even at a high standard. Vegan leather is ultimately much less durable than real leather and tends to be thinner, so it’s not uncommon for it to tear or scuff badly over time.

HOW TO UNWRINKLE VEGAN LEATHER
It is important that you do not try to iron wrinkled vegan leather by putting the iron directly on the material. The method you should use to remove wrinkles depends on the quality of the material. Because synthetic 'pleathers' have plastic in them, they do not mix well with heat, and it can often ruin the product completely. High-quality faux leathers can be steamed to remove wrinkles if protected with a sheet, towel, or lining, as they are much more forgiving against heat. However, there still should be a lot of care taken when doing this. It is important that you don’t heat your fake leather for more than 30 seconds.

HOW TO SHRINK VEGAN LEATHER
METHOD:
1. Wash the item in your washing machine on warm to clean off the article and prevent any contamination from 'baking' into the plastic material of the pleather.

2. Put the polyurethane item into an old pillowcase and tie off the top with a shoelace or piece of string to prevent it from falling out. Materials like this may get hot enough to stick to the dryer’s drum, damaging the jacket and making a mess, so avoid this happening at all costs.

3. Set the dryer on high. Let the cycle go for about an hour. Allow the jacket to cool off, and then test-fit it. Repeat the cycle as needed, using progressively shorter drying times until satisfied.

CAN YOU STRETCH VEGAN LEATHER?
Faux leather does stretch, but not as much as real leather. You need to be careful when trying to stretch fake leather because it increases the risk of it cracking, so it’s best to avoid it altogether.

Can you digest vegetable leaves?
Trying to distress faux leather will more often than not result in damaging the item. Most people tend to create a distressing effect on faux leather using thin layers of acrylic or fabric paint; thick layers can result in vegan leather cracking and peeling the top layer entirely. Be sure to use paints or dyes suitable for the material, as solvents often eat away at the pleather.

Remember to test the paint on a small, inconspicuous area of the product first before applying it all over.

HOW TO DYE VEGAN LEATHER
Faux leather is not as permeable as real leather, which means the material cannot easily absorb colored dye. Therefore, even after dyeing your faux leather product, you should be aware that the process will most likely need to be repeated throughout the product's life span as the color wears off over time.


METHOD:
1. Prepare the pleather surface by wiping it down with a clean cloth to remove any dust or dirt particles. For a thorough clean, it’s recommended to wipe the product down with pure alcohol.


2. Once clean and dry, your vegan leather product is ready to be dyed with upholstery paint. Please see the instructions on the paint product for the recommended drying time.


Remember to test the paint on a small, inconspicuous area of the product first before applying it all over.


HOW TO SOFTEN VEGAN LEATHER
Vegan leather is less permeable than real leather, and therefore traditional leather conditioning products have little impact on softening the material. Vinyl conditioner is typically recommended for softening faux leather and should be applied with a soft cloth in small circular motions. The excess conditioner should then be removed with a clean cloth before leaving the product to dry. The process can be repeated until the desired level of softness is achieved.







OOO, Lovely

Hi Loves,

It's Lovely herself ☝☝☝

and today I have a guest on the page.

Jessica Ariel Wendroff (@jesswendroff) is a Photo Editor and Writer at Elite Daily. When she is not working, she is stepping into postcards, being a shopping goddess, or shooting street photography. Today she is writing about a very important topic for demisexual people."I'm Demisexual: You Have To Seduce My Heart Before You Get To My Body



I’m the pickiest gatekeeper when it comes to the people I let into my inner circle.  Not to toot my own horn, but -- according to others -- my green eyes, dirty blonde/mermaid hair, and deep curves make me "attractive." Despite my features, though, I have a tendency to date people who are what you might call "genetically jaded."  In other words, my friends have ALWAYS told me I "could do better" whenever they see a picture of the guy I'm dating. Every. Single. One. They called me "Beauty" and the boy "Beast."  “Are you blind?! Just think of how your poor children will look!” girlfriends would shriek as they held his Insta in their hands, and I’d giggle and cover my face with my hands in shame.  But I would still always decide to give the guy a chance, even if I wasn’t physically attracted to him. And, to be honest, out of all the guys I’ve EVER had ANY type of relationship with, I was never initially attracted to their looks.


When it comes to my choice in men, their souls always override their physical appearance -- the thing that people usually prioritize. Somehow my eyes have developed superhero X-ray vision that the rest of the world seems to lack.  And in almost 24 years, I’ve kissed fewer people than I have fingers, been in relationships with only three men, and only been on ONE date that didn't lead to another. And I’ve finally figured out why I can date people I don't initially find that physically attractive.  I am a demisexual.  Since I am demisexual, I do “not experience sexual attraction unless [I] form a strong emotional connection with someone.”  The first time I read this, it made perfect sense. All of my boyfriends had originally been my friends.  Demisexuals don't let just anyone into their lives or their bodies. The way to a demisexual's body is through the mind. Here’s why:  Demisexuals put the “friend” in boyfriend or girlfriend. All of the moments and memories you have to make up who you are. Demisexuals have to get to know those pieces before we decide whether or not we want to play with them.


We like to know as much about our partners as possible, and we do that by being close -- or even best friends with -- a potential partner. In the beginning, it's all about friendship and chemistry.  We spend a lot of time talking. We go on late-night drives, eat Chipotle, and FaceTime until we have to trudge to work with eggplants under our eyes. We do all these things in the name of love.  It's our duty to know how you broke your arm when you were 10 or why your favorite song is Puddle of Mudd's "Blurry." We need to know what motivates you in the morning before we can even think about waking you up with oral.  Demisexuals need to spend time with you before they can be wined and dined by you. Since the emotional bond established in friendship is a prerequisite to being in a relationship with us, demisexuals are terrified of the thought of online dating and random hookups.  Tinder represents dating as a gateway to sex. This frightens us. We need to be able to take comfort in knowing that people acknowledge the constellations of our past before seeing the birthmarks on our skin.  We're probably more sensitive than most, so it's scary to even think of spending time with people who haven't already proven themselves worthy of our attention.  Demisexuals don’t have sex; they make love. Demisexuals want to be intimate with our partners in every sense of the word.  To us, sex isn't just about hitting a G-spot or getting a fix; it's about revealing the most vulnerable parts of our bodies to someone who already knows the most vulnerable parts of our lives.  In contrast to those who can "hit it and quit it," demisexuals choose sexual partners very, very carefully. We want to look into the eyes of a partner and see someone worthwhile staring back.


Demisexuals have to be able to trust before being able to lust. Demisexuals can be THE biggest freaks. We can have sexual appetites usually seen in nymphomaniacs, but if we're not comfortable with you, we're not going to let you see that sexual side of us.  We need to know what's on your mind before we see what's in your pants.  Answering how many partners you've had and if you're STD-free is not sufficient enough to have sex with us.  Demisexuals need to swoon before we spoon. We truly need to know that we can feel comfortable with -- and trust -- our partners.  We don’t want to get hurt. And because of how much we value an emotional connection, we take the proper time to touch each other before actually touching each other."

Thank you, Jessica, for writing and sharing this story with us. 

Lovely 💜💜💜

This post is about Randy, one of the Dads in our FreedHearts Dads Facebook group. With his permission, I want to share it with you. Here is Randy’s toast from the wedding reception…

Hi Lovelys
It's Lovely
Herself 💖💖💖

“Saturday night, my daughter, Rachel, married the love of her life, Amy. This last year has been such a struggle of losing friends and strained relationships with family because we unconditionally love and support our beautiful Christian gay daughter. However, we know we have made the right choice.”

First of all, Danette and I, along with Rachel and Amy would just like to say thanks to all of you for making it a priority to be here today. Some family and friends couldn’t make it, and some made a choice not to be here, but you chose to be here, and we really appreciate it.


Really, this is a gathering of family and good friends that have been so supportive of Rachel and Amy, and Danette and me as we have been on this journey.


Today is not the wedding day Danette and I first envisioned when we had Rachel as a baby. I have to admit that as any good father would have, I had dreamed of intimidating some guy and making him sweat while he asked me if he could marry my daughter. But Amy screwed that all up. It is not nearly as much fun scaring a girl.


Danette and I would not change anything about this day even if we could. Because to change it would mean Rachel would have had to change to be someone that she is not and that is something we would never want.


Rachel, Amy, you are both made in God's image exactly the way he wanted you to be. We love you both so very deeply so just remember this. Be loud and be proud!! Just kidding, just be yourself exactly as God made you.


This wedding has been costly in many ways. For some of us, it cost money. In a way, for some others, it cost even more.


We want to say a special thank you from the bottom of our heart to Pastor Matt Essig. The two greatest commandments are Love God and love your neighbor. Matt has embraced that and put that into action.


Those are easy words to say but often times so very difficult to put into practical application. Over the last year, you have exemplified both of those things, and we are so grateful that you have shown unconditional love to our family, and more importantly to Rachel and Amy.


In many ways, Matt has paid and continues to pay a very high cost for his willingness to show love. I’m not sure why that is so hard for many Christians since that is exactly what we are called to do.


So, again Matt and Jessie we can never express in words how much you both have meant to us over the last year, and we want you to know we realize the cost you paid to be a part of this today, and for that, we are forever grateful.


To Frank and Ellen (my Wife Danette’s parents and Rachel’s grandparents), we are so thankful you have been there for Rachel, Amy, and us. You are a wonderful example of how a family should be, and how a family loves unconditionally.


Maya Angelou said, yes I am quoting Maya Angelou, “Do the best you can until you know better, and when you know better do better.” Well in the past Danette and I did the best we could, but now we know better, and since now we know better we are doing better. To our gay friends here today I just want to say I believe God made you exactly as you were meant to be, and he loves you exactly the way you are.


Amy, today Rachel made a decision to choose you. Today Danette and I also choose you. We choose you to be our daughter, and though we feel like we have already welcomed you into our family today in front of these friends and family we make it official. We will be there for you, to give advice, but only if you want it. Well maybe every once in a while even when you don’t want it. We will be there to help you and to love and protect you just like you are our own daughter.


Rachel and Amy, we believe that God made you exactly the way he wants you to be and that you were made in his image. We look forward to watching you both grow as individuals, and also as a couple and in your love for each other.


Remember to remain friends, and to treat each other with love and respect even when you may not feel like it. Do your best to put each other's needs before your own, and if you do this you can’t go wrong. We love you both and are so excited for you and can’t wait to see what the future holds.


So if everyone will please join me in raising a toast to Amy and Rachel. To many years of love and happiness.


And this is Randy’s wife Danette’s Facebook post about the wedding…


Yesterday we celebrated one of the happiest days of our lives! This day was filled with nothing but love and joy and some happy tears. It was filled with a lot of laughter, great food, and the best friends and family to help us celebrate love. I wouldn’t have done anything differently. Rachel, when I think back to when you struggled through those emotions and feeling of being alone when you realized you were gay and that you dealt with that by yourself, I could just cry.


You were just a girl who loved Jesus and realized you were gay. And, I’m sure you felt scared and alone. You wanted to have it all. Your family and God, and your future. And you didn’t think you’d be able to have it all.


So, like your mom, it will always be my greatest sadness that Dad and I did not do our own work early enough so that you felt safe and beloved in your own family.


I hate that you had to feel lonely, scared, and vulnerable. I am so sorry. And I’m so sad about that. And if I could go back, I would change it. I would shake myself to life before you were even born, shake some sense into me. Like, “Look at this, look at what this is causing. Just look around, use your eyes, use your ears, use your brain, and use your heart.” And I wish I could have gone back and changed that. And I’m so sorry, and I’m so sad that you suffered. And I’ll always be sad. I’ll always be sad about that.


But also, we are so proud of who you are. I would not change one molecule of you, not one. I’m so glad you’re gay, I’m so proud that you are free. I love that this is how you were made. I’m thrilled about your future.


And I’m so happy that you found Amy! You both compliment each other so well. We love you both! Cheers to a healthy, happy life! (This was the toast that I would have given if I could talk without crying through it) I’m happy that today you have it all… Jesus, your family, and the beginning of your future.


Photos from One Photo: https://www.onephotophoto.com/


Love this story so I wanted to share it with you.


OOO, Lovely.

 


Hi Lovelys,

It's Lovely

HERSELF

and in today's post, I wanted to share my best photos in vinyl leggings from my very first vinyl leggings shooting.

Thanks for your support and love, and I hope that you enjoy the photos.

If you have missed the first part of this series which is the most clicked on my blog so far

PLEASE CLICK HERE.

But with this series, I hope we will have a new all-time favorite 😊😊😊

Have a lovely Sunday and stay safe.























All photos are copyright protected and made by myself.

OOO, Lovely.


She doesn’t get attached because she simply learned that attachment is the root of all evil. It makes her cling to things she should release. It makes her chase people that are wrong for her. It makes her go after things that are probably not meant for her. It clouds her logic and her judgment because she’s holding on due to fear rather than conviction.

She doesn’t get attached because she learned that not everything is hers to keep. She knows that there are blessings in letting go and in goodbyes and in releasing whatever was holding her back. She knows that the more she is attached to something and afraid of losing it, the more she will push it away because she’s only focused on receiving rather than giving.

She doesn’t get attached because she knows that people eventually leave. They don’t always mean what they say. They don’t always keep their promises. They don’t always come back. They don’t always love her forever, and even if they do, love is sometimes not enough to keep a relationship going. She knows that getting attached too soon will always end in disappointment. She knows that people change their minds overnight.

She doesn’t get attached anymore because she’s tired of people pulling away, people changing their minds, people leaving, and people not knowing what they want or what they’re seeking.

She doesn’t get attached anymore because she realized that one-sided attachment hurts. One-sided attachment always brings her pain. One-sided attachment makes her love herself a little less and makes her forget her own worth. She realized that when she gets attached she loses herself, and she vowed never to lose herself for anyone again.

She doesn’t get attached anymore because she’s learning to let go, she’s learning to move on, and she’s learning that it doesn’t always have to be her way. She’s learning that her heart is not always right and attraction can be blind. She’s slowly learning to detach from everything that makes her question herself or her love.

She doesn’t get attached, but she still knows how to love. She’s finally accepting that they’re not the same. She’s finally learning that if you really love someone, maybe releasing them is the ultimate expression of love—it means letting them be who they truly want to be or letting them be with the partner they’ve always wanted. She’s finally learning that if she’s meant to be with someone, they’ll both kind of attach to each other by default, like a magnet, without anyone pushing or pulling, without anyone detaching and without any need to control one another.

She doesn’t get attached anymore because she’s finally learning that everything is temporary and maybe the whole point of love is just to enjoy it while it lasts instead of trying to cling to it forever.

Hi, Lovelies,

It's Lovely

HERSELF

Today is Sunday Funday so I thought I will take some minutes and show you the best, funniest, craziest, and best Instagram messages I received during the past few weeks and I will comment on them 😊😊😊

But before we do that I wanted to say that I love to read your messages and it is really nice to hear from you with any kind of feedback. But I get too many of those messages, and when I created that post I actually wanted to do a few only but there are so many messages and I cannot reply to them all. Hope you understand that but be sure that I am reading your messages and they make my day better, not all, but most of them.

So thank you for being so interactive with me, I really appreciate that.

If you want to follow me on my most active social media just click on this

LINK

So without further due let's get started.



This is one of the funniest messages, even though the content is nice, but would you really introduce yourself as "Love leather n latex to"?
Funny 😃😃😃



The craziest part was that he gave me his telephone immediately. Nice, but I don't know who you are and it is funny to shot like gunfire and share one of your most intimate contact detail with me already. I did not even get the chance to reply 😊😊😊


What shall I comment on this? Maybe "Hi"? 😂😂😂
You guys are funny.


This is one of the most frequent messages that I get. There is n introduction at all and when I am thinking about reaching out to a cooperation partner then I would at least appreciate a little introduction first and your message should start by saying "Hello" and "Hi" at least.



Anyways this is what the profile said. I am an alternative fashion victim so I guess cooperations like that would not fit my content.
Thanks for the offer though 😉😉😉


Guys, all info about my shop, how to order, and where to find me is either written on my website right here including the address or on my Facebook page.



Thank you so much, this is really kind of you. He said that my profile on Instagram appear often in his feed and he wanted to leave a compliment and a nice message saying that my lifestyle is really interesting and that I am courageous enough to share this lifestyle. That is why I am a unicorn and an interesting human. He added wishes for a happy weekend and highlighted my Lockdown Sessions on YouTube.

Thank you so much. These messages are pretty rare but I love those most. 😍😍😍



No comment here 😂😂😂



I guess I commented on this already just have a look above.




No, no, no. No, thanks 💢💢💢💢💢💢💢💢💢💢💢💢



😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍


Hm, everything you need to know is either in each and every post on my Instagram posts or here 😁😁😁



Thank you. The best messages that someone who is a content creator such as I am can receive I think. Thank you so much 😊😊😊

This is it.
These are some, not all messages that I have received over the past few days.
Thank you again for sharing your thoughts, and comments with me. I do appreciate it a lot.
Please forgive me if I am not replying to all messages, or at least a few weeks later.

Thank you and have a lovely Sunday Funday,

OOO Lovely.

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ABOUT ME

Lovely Skye is a multifaceted creator, spiritual seeker, and former award-winning adult content model who channels her experiences into storytelling, photography, and personal transformation through projects like *A Moment of Lovely by Lovely Skye*. With a passion for authenticity, self-expression, and deep connection, she merges spirituality, creativity, and bold individuality across blogging, podcasting, and alternative modeling.
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About Blog

Lovely Skye is a multifaceted creator, spiritual seeker, and former award-winning adult content model who channels her experiences into storytelling, photography, and personal transformation through projects like *A Moment of Lovely by Lovely Skye*. With a passion for authenticity, self-expression, and deep connection, she merges spirituality, creativity, and bold individuality across blogging, podcasting, and alternative modeling. "

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